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Final Destination 5 Review

Dinah’s Rating: 4.5/10
Player Affinity Composite Rating: 4.0/10
(2 reviews total)

It’s terrible to have your high hopes dashed by a terrible movie experience. Unfortunately, Final Destination 5 will do just that for its small dedicated fanbase. Unlike the previous sequel, it is not as self-aware or funny. Although it warms up near the end of the film, the opening sequences and first few deaths are neither elaborate nor creative.

You already know the story. Someone has a premonition that a serious accident is going to happen and warns a few of his friends. A few people avoid said massive accident but are later killed in freak occurences. It is a great premise and offers a great many fun opportunities. The creators did not go that route however; they went instead for the boring slice and dice. Whereas earlier in the franchise we were treated to horrific deaths that seemed so dreadfully possible (think malfunctioning elevator doors), deaths that you just plain didn’t see coming (cut to pieces by barbed wire, anyone?), and deaths that made you giggle at the absurdity (the infamous death by toilet water, folks) it is now all about broken bones and smashed faces. 

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Many of the deaths leave much to the imagination. I was more deeply satisfied with the frying in the tanning bed deaths than the lazer eye surgery one of our nameless beautiful actresses is subjected to. The most pitiable sequence is that of the gymnast. Your local juvenile delinquent could have found something cooler to do. And the massage parlor scene — don’t get me started! The dialogue was better than the finish, but even that felt forced. Obviously the acting runs from mediocre to tragic. Courtney B. Vance presents the only credible actor in the mix. Tony Todd is a caricature of himself as Bloodworth; he adds a bit of spunk into the mix. Thanks to the ominous coroner, the teenie-boppers are battling it out to kill one another, which adds a bit of zest.

On the scale of first installment to last, Final Destination 5 ranks dead last in terms of its opening premonition. The suspension bridge collapse was shrug-inducing. The ending will please those who have been watching the series faithfully since the beginning. It is clever in a Saw sort of way. However, Final Destination 5 is just missing the base ingredient — elaborate death sequences. What the producers spent on 3D could have been better used on better deaths. Instead of being inventive and fun, Final Destination 5 is basically going for gross. The 3D is supposedly high quality, but I suggest you save this film for DVD nigh t… a boring, rainy night when you’re already sleepy and just need some background noise to snooze to. 

Rating: 4.5/10

Final Destination 5
Directed by Steven Quale
Written by Eric Heisserer and Jeffrey Reddick
Starring: Nicholas D’Agosto, Emma Bell, Tony Todd, and Courtney B. Vance

Other Player Affinity Reviews

Simon thought: “Following a downward trajectory exhibited by the roller coaster in Final Destination 3, this “you gonna die” franchise has been slipping in quality since the cleverly premised original, finally splatting on the not-so-proverbial pavement in The Final Destination. Although this fifth installment offers a blissful bump up from that offering, the premise is officially as dead as its protagonists. Its slight tweak in formula and a last-scene twist are nothing remotely exciting enough to save the pedestrian execution of the preceding acts. The bridge collapse scene, which is supposed to be the pulse of the movie, seems stunted from the usually elaborate and lengthy sequences of grisly destruction. Elsewhere, the individual asides as death stalks its escapees are sans suspense, save one involving an upright screw on a gymnastics balance beam which had me gritting my teeth. Once again simplicity proves to be the go-to means of elevating tension.” Rating: 3.5/10

Player Affinity Composite Rating: 4.0/10 

 

 
Rating
4.0

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