- Video Games
- About Us
The Xbox 360 has had its share of amazing games; games like most of the Halo series, Mass Effect 2, and Gears of War have definitely kept us playing our 360’s into the long hours of the night. But there are some games that just don’t hit the gaming sweet spot. These are the games that make you lament the fact that you turned on your console.
Hydrophobia released only last Wednesday, may not have been my most anticipated game ever but I at least expected a playable game. What I got as piece of trash with a nice side of horrible combat and poor storytelling. Hydrophobia has a good interesting premise but the developers shit all over that within the first hour of the game.
While Hydrophobia was never going to be a game of the year, it at least had potential If that was potential was placed into another developer’s hands, maybe it wouldn’t have been squandered like it was.
2. Crackdown 2
I loved the original Crackdown. It was a fun, frantic, action-packed game that I couldn’t get enough of. Because of this fact, I was extremely excited for Crackdown 2. When I heard it was being developed by another dev, I wasn’t so sacred as when sequels switch hands, it can still be pretty damn good (Take Bioshock 2 for example).
When I first popped in Crackdown 2 I had no problem with it. It was nothing revaluti0onary by any means but it seemed fun enough. I played it for around an hour ad realized I had done all this 3 years ago, and the slight variety that was delivered by Crackdown 2 was repeated every twenty minutes it seemed. The other variety apart from the missions, Renegade Orbs, just weren’t fun to chase. I didn’t think it could happen but not only did Crackdown get less fun, it got uglier. The entire city became incredibly bland. Much like the rest of the game.
1. Mass Effect 1
Though at the time I played Mass Effect, I had never enjoyed a Bioware game, that didn’t hamper my excitement for the game as it seemed like an incredibly interesting sci-fi story. Once I got my hands on Mass Effect, I was fairly skeptical as if I would enjoy it or not. I notice quite quickly that Mass Effect wasn’t for me.
I don’t think “it wasn’t me” was the real problem as Mass Effect had a ton of problems, one being the incredibly slow start. It took around two hours until I actually got to do something and what I finally got to do was drive one of the worst controlling vehicles I’ve ever seen in a game. After many game over’s, I got to the end of that planet and was doing a boss battle Due to the poor combat and terrible healing system, I died and then had to drive all over again. I turned the game off then.
Since then, I’ve tried to get into Mass Effect 1 many times, never getting more than 3 hours in. The oddest thing about my distaste for Mass Effect is the fact that I loved Mass Effect 2. As much as I wish it wasn’t, Mass Effect 1 remains an underwhelming and disappointing game.
3. Crackdown 2
This game wouldn’t be a bad game at all if it didn’t have the “2” at the end. The “2” implies that something should have been added, or that some sort of improvement over the previous title has been implemented. Crackdown 2 doesn’t do anything of the sort. In fact, Pacific City looks exactly the same as it was 3 years ago, and if the only fun part of your game is a gloried scavenger hunt, then you have a serious problem.
2. Samurai Shodown Sen
The original Samurai Shodown Series was quite a great title for the NeoGeo and in arcades. This sequel, which is extremely late to the party, is an atrocity and I’m surprised that SNK would allow their name to be attached to this game. The game looks bad, like a hastily put together PS2 game, and controls even worse. If you love practicing for four hours to finally be able to do a decent 4 hit combo then this is your game. The game loads at a snail’s pace and the translation would been sub-par for a 1992 budget title. I still have no idea what “the Impact Blue of Justice” means and I suppose that I never will (or that I even want to know.)
1. Bomberman: Act Zero
If you do not remember this game you are one of the lucky ones. Bomberman: Act Zero is what happens when you try to make a classic character contemporary and it fails miserably. The graphics are bad, the sound is similar to hyenas screeching, and this game sucks. Animal waste compressed into a disc may actually produce a better game than this. If anyone can confirm my hypothesis, let me know. Just, for the love of god, don’t mail me a review copy of that game.
3. Fable 2
So I never played a Fable game till Fable 2. I had a PS2, and it really was never enough for me to get an Xbox so I went on playing my JRPGs. Fast forward 4 years, and I was sitting outside a Gamestop at midnight waiting for the game. Sure the hype helped, but I had friends behind me too. I wanted to jump into a friend’s game, and have my way with his wife. However Mr. Molyneux couldn’t keep that promise.
What I found when I started playing was a sandbox. It wasn’t for another few days that I’d find all the game had to offer. The whole wife thing was not unique at all. In fact I started marrying women just to see how many I could marry in a single town before they met, and I got divorced and had to pay digital child support (5 if you were wondering). It got to the point that I just shot people if they said anything about me, but that even got old. Like it was a sandbox, and it had now given me a rash of the worse kind. The “I just wasted $60 on this” itch. I wouldn’t play it again for another 4 months, and then I literally took it to Gamestop after beating it. Now excuse me while I go try to get people to like me while I fart, and make funny noises.
2. BioShock 2
I loved BioShock, and I really thought I was going to be in for a treat with BioShock 2. I rented it a few weeks after it came out, and out of the gate it was pretty much déjà vu. It was nice, but it felt off.
The game kept an OK pace until I had to defend my first little sister. A mission I really didn’t care about, and would not ever have to do again. However this time I had to do it; even if I was just going to harvest her for her delicious ADAM. Honestly though I tried so many times to save the first one. Each death made it harder, and harder, and harder! This continued until I had to back track to get useful ammo since no one dropped anything useful in any of the waves of enemies! It was at this point I stopped giving a damn. I realized that the first game really did wrap up the whole story, and that this was just a big pipe dream.
1. Halo 3
First off before I get all the hate I want to say I was never a big Halo fan. I owned a PS2. I only played the first two out of the good graces of my friends. However in the two years before it was released it was made out to be God. They got everyone talking, and wouldn’t you know it came out when I was in college so all my Bro friends were bugging the shit out of me about it. The worst part is I actually started buying into the hype.
I played the game a little after midnight when my door was nearly bashed in by some friends. They got it at the midnight release, and they wanted to be the first in the dorm to play some multiplayer. I liked it at first, but by the time I actually got my hands on it a few days later I started noticing things. The game really wasn’t as pretty as many made it out to be (and was downright ugly at times), the story frankly sucked, and it was pretty much Halo 2’s multiplayer (except with a $60 price tag). To make matters worse I got into the Call of Duty 4 beta, and I saw I had bought the wrong shooter.