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Bob’s Burgers – Sacred Cow

It’s a very special day at Bob’s Burgers as Bob is on track
to cook his 100,000 burger. He has the kids join him in the freezer to make the
special announcement and display the meat that will be used. After Bob’s announcement the kids each take turns going around the room
making announcements of their own. Tina starts them off by announcing that her
bra is chaffing her followed by Gene’s declaration of his love of house music.
Louise announces that she’s finally getting her gun license; this is followed
by a genuine congrats from Tina and Gene’s disgust by the fact that she had to
wait three days to get it. Linda ends the banter when she busts out the banner
that they had printed from their “old computer”. The gag is that it’s from a
dot-matrix printer and has the dotted edges that still need to be torn off. She
finishes by saying that they should have hit 100,000 a long time ago, but were
way off.

Later Bob stands in the kitchen cooking and talking to the burgers as he makes his way up to 100,000. A van pulls up to the store with a
film crew. Bob gets excited thinking it’s free publicity about their landmark
burger. It turns out to be a documentary film maker making a movie about the
beef industry. His name is Randy and he’s basically there to launch a smear campaign
about Bob and his burger goal. Randy brings out a cow with a blond wig on tells
Bob that he has to decide if the cow lives or dies. The cows name is Moolissa,
but Bob’s quick to point out the fact that she has a penis. Randy says that
they milked Moolissa that morning and hands him a bucket. By this time the
children have joined them outside and Gene declares the “milk” to be urine and
follows up the statement saying that he knows urine. Linda comes out to complete
the family with her hands covered with blood from grinding up meat. She puts
cow blood all over the Moolissa when touching her hair.
Bob's Burgers - Sacred Cow

The film crew is renting the vacancy next to Bob so that
they can keep Moolissa in front of the store with their van which has a
Cow-ntdown clock running down till “her” death. Unfortunately for Randy it brings in a lot
of business for Bob as people want to see what the hub-bub is about. The first
day Bob loves the business that the film brings in, but when a rain storm hits he takes pity on Moolissa and brings “her” into his house. This of course
wakes the family up. Linda protests the cow being in their home, but Bob
assures her nothing will happen. Until Moolissa instantly pees on the
floor of the living room which Gene is very happy about. He pulls down his
pants and yells for everyone to join in on the peeing because this is the best
dream he’s ever had.

This was a great episode that actually has a lot of heart to
it. The wig on Moolissa really humanizes her for Bob’s character and it makes
him think about how many cows he’s killed. But as his subconscious reminds him,
cows are not wild stallions or humpback whales but that they want to be special too. So
Bob continues to kill and grill and make cows into something delicious to eat.
Bob's Burgers - Sacred Cow

The episode has some great gags mostly coming from Louise voiced
by Kristen Shaal. I would say that the writer’s need to tone down her character
before she casts a shadow on the other characters, but she’s just too damn
funny. Whenever Bob’s on Camera trying to defend his point Louise yells out, “MURDER!”
at the top of her lungs and the delivery is so good that it never gets old. I
think that this is the episode that really hooked me on the show. The gags were
good, the story was good and basically everything worked well with each other.
The best gag of the episode actually comes from Bob as he’s talking to a deceased Moolissa. He tells Bob that he’s a castrated bull and Bob fires back, “And I’m a married man. Same thing right?” 


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